Creating a Special Mother’s Day for Someone Who Has Dementia

To help families, friends and partners  create a special Mother’s Day for those  living with Alzheimer’s disease or a related dementia, the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America (AFA) is offering five tips to celebrate in a dementia-friendly manner this Sunday, May 11.

Jennifer Reeder, LCSW, AFA’s Senior Director of Educational and Social Services, said, “Following a few steps can help you celebrate your special person and the bond you share in a dementia-friendly manner this Mother’s Day.”

Follow these five tips to celebrate Mother’s Day with someone who is living with dementia:

• Reminisce together. Familiar faces and old photos can bring joy and comfort to someone living with dementia. Look at old photos together and talk about them with your loved one as you go through them: for example, who the people are, what the occasion was, and where it took place.  Avoid asking questions like, “do you remember?” Be patient and attentive when listening to your loved one’s stories and memories. Validate their feelings and experiences, even if they don’t align with reality. This validation reinforces feelings of connection.
• Make new memories. Quality time together is one of the best Mother’s Day gifts to give. When planning activities, take a strengths-based and person-centered approach and incorporate what the person can do and what they choose to do now, rather than dwelling on past abilities. Focus on those things that bring joy, comfort and involvement.
• Adapt old favorites. Dementia-related illnesses can affect a person’s ability to do things as they once did, so it’s important to be adaptable. If the person loved going to a certain restaurant but no longer can manage eating out, order food from that establishment instead.
• Flowers are a gift that has therapeutic benefits. Flowers are a very popular Mother’s Day gift, and they can be especially good for someone living with dementia. The fragrance can help improve mood, promote positive feelings, and stimulate the brain. Buy a bouquet of fresh flowers, set it on a table, and enjoy the scents together.
• Make your own Mother’s Day card. Write a Mother’s Day card and read it out loud to your loved one. Even if they can no longer grasp the full meaning, it will be meaningful in an individual way to them, and the act of writing it and communicating with your love can also lift your own spirits.

AFA’s Helpline, staffed entirely by licensed social workers who are specifically trained in dementia care, can provide additional information and support for families. The Helpline is available seven days a week by phone (866-232-8484), text message (646-586-5283), and web chat (www.alzfdn.org).